Creative pictures and other ways to rationalize

The above picture appeared in my Facebook news feed the other day. I see probably a 100 pictures in my news feed everyday so I rarely comment but sometimes, if I see something very compelling, I will give a "like" or share the picture. 

In the limited space of a a Facebook comment I didn't feel that I could properly convey my thoughts about the above picture. 

Thus today's blog post.  

To be 100% honest I do not like this picture. As a matter of fact I hate it. To me it's a lot like the YMCA not keeping score in kids soccer and giving everybody a trophy. Or these schools that don't give grades because they don't want the kids to feel bad about themselves. 

I think the picture is damaging because it helps people to rationalize the fact that they CAN CHANGE yet they choose not to because they are convinced they can not. 

The picture is intended for, and thus totally appropriate, for the 30 year old woman who weights 135 but used to be 115 in high school. Or the runner who can't figure out why her friend who doesn't run at all is 10 lbs less then she. Your weight is fine. You're good. 

For many people the scale isn't the best way to judge health and wellness. 

But let's be real. For most people the scale is a GREAT way to judge your health. 

If you were 140 lbs at 21 and your scale says you are 240 lbs at 31 should you ignore the scale because at least you are a good person? 

No.

That is not the point and I want to make sure that you understand that it's not about judging a persons self worth or who they are. People are not defined by their weight. People are not (or at least they shouldn't be) less loved based on their health. 

The fact of the matter is that it is hard to make a difference in the lives of others if you are unhealthy and sick.

If we as fitness professionals tell people that it is OK to be unhealthy then what are we doing to change the problem? Yes, it is a tough stance to take and it is HARD to face realities sometimes but it must be done.  

Many issues affect a persons weight and health. Some people honestly do need to ignore the scale. Some people obsess over a number that really means NOTHING. Some people.

In my opinion the VAST MAJORITY of people that look at the scale need to look at the scale and say, "Holy CRAP, I can't believe I weight that much. I HAVE TO do something NOW...."

I am a firm believer that YOUR health is YOUR problem. YOUR health is YOUR concern. YOUR health is 100% YOUR responsibility. It doesn't matter if you rationalize it or not. Nobody is going to change you. No book you read, no program you buy, not ObamaCare, not your trainer, not the YMCA or Gold's gym....

You are the one in charge. If you CHOOSE to focus on the fact that you are a good person and it's the fault of someone else that you are unhealthy then that is....wait for it.... YOUR CHOICE. 

Our job as fitness coaches is to help you once you have made the choice to change. I can do nothing for you if you are 400 lbs but have a good sense of humor. 

I can, however, help you if you look at the scale and choose to be disgusted by the number that you see. 

Here is YOUR action plan.

1. Look at your scale.

2. Decide what the number means to you.

3. Check with a fitness coach and ask them what they think.

4. Decide if the number means nothing or means something. 

5. Go exercise.

Does that make sense? 

If you got value from this blog post please like and share. 

Flip the switch

I had a phone conversation the other day that just broke my heart. It all started with a private Facebook message from a girl named Betty. (not her real name)

"good morning mr copley my name is Betty and i wanted more information on how you help people transform there lives to a healthier better them. what all do you do and how in the world do you do it!"

I really didn't know this person but she had found me on Facebook so I was excited to talk to her and see what we could do to help her.

It a general sense with our AdvoCare business we help people to get physical results and we help people earn some plan B income by helping the people that they know. From this brief message I got the impression that she wanted a little of both. When I asked her she affirmed my thoughts and said she wanted to help others.

I got a little suspicious when I tried to set up a time for Teresa and I to meet with her in a park. She balked at that so we set up a phone call in the instead.

Before I got a chance to talk to her on the phone I found out how she came to know of me and I found out that she is morbidly obese to the tune of well over 400 lbs.

I went into the phone conversation not really knowing what to think but 100% willing to help this lady however I could.

To be truthful I think I knew what to expect. I was just hoping for something different.

The reality is that people that are over 400 lbs. are not bad people. They just think in a different way. It doesn't make them evil or wrong. It's simply a mindset issue. I am a firm believer that morbid obesity in most cases isn't genetic but a way of thinking that leads to the massive weight gain.

When I spoke to this lady I found our that she is young (under 30) with a young child (under 10). She is also single and unable to work because of her weight.

Honestly the details of her life broke me heart. How can someone live like that?

I spoke with her for a while and I was kind yet firm. I asked her questions about her nutrition and, again, I think I knew the answers before I asked the questions but I was hoping...

I have learned over the years to know ask people open ended questions like, "how do you eat?". People ALWAYS say either, "I eat pretty well..." or "I know what to eat, I just don't always do it..."

Both are lies.

This is the question I asked: "What did you eat for breakfast this morning?"

"Nothing. I don't eat breakfast. When I eat breakfast I get sleepy."

"What did you have for lunch today?"

"A McRib".

"What did you have for a dinner?"

"A piece of pizza."

It doesn't take a degree in nutrition to figure out what the problem is. I didn't ask any other questions. This poor lady is starving herself and is 300 lbs over weight because of it.

This broke my heart because there is nothing that I can do. Yeah, I talked to her for quite a while. I, again, was firm but kind but at the end of the day her health is a decision that she has to make.

It broke my heart because I could tell from the tone of her voice that she wasn't ready to change and she still thought that it was "her metabolism" that was the problem. In other words...at least there is some outside force to blame.

I have been doing this a long time and it still never ceases to amaze me the number of people who appear to need so much help yet, what they fail to realize is that the help they need is simply a flip of the switch in their own mind.

Here is the simple 4 part plan I gave to Betty to get her on track:

1. Eat breakfast each and everyday.
2. No more fast food.
3. No soda.
4. Buy a cleanse and a box of Spark from her friend who is a distributor on our Advocare team.

In my mind, with my mindset, this is simple and will produce MASSIVE results.

I hope with all my heart that she sees the switch and she flips it. I just don't know if she will....